I Would Tell Cavs Fans Not To Get Their Hopes Up About LeBron Again.. But It’s Too Funny Watching Cleveland’s Heart Break In Real Time

I think once LeBron’s agent cockteases Cleveland enough.. we might, just mighhht, be able to hear the accumulative shattering of Cleveland hearts..



So, everybody today seems to think LeBron is heading back to Cleveland.. You have got to be kidding me.. last time a Cleveland sports team won a championship was in 1964 when the Browns won the NFL Championship (pre-Super Bowl Era).. Heartbreak City ever since.. Bron knows it, I know it, the world knows it.

I honestly don’t care if you throw the mid-90s Chicago Bulls in Cavs jerseys.. they will find some miserable way to lose in the most heartbreaking fashion possible.. that’s just how it goes in Cleveland. Factory of Sadness.

So, the notion that Bron is going to sign back with the Cavs.. is 100% ridiculous.. and I’ll be damned if it actually happens.

I mean seriously Cleveland? You want this fuckboi back?? You were burning his jersey just a few years ago.. he ripped your fucking heart out.. if you were a good girlfriend you’d remember that shit and never fucking forget it.. no matter how much you want him back, you’d be like “No.. I remember that time you slapped me across the face and cheated on me with that dirty little slut Miami” that shit can’t be undone.. just can’t.. once a cheater always a cheater. AmIRight??

UPDATE: After talking with LeBron, Chris Bosh is considering max contract with the Houston Rockets per ESPN

Is it even possible the Heat break up this year and leave Pat Riley in a pool of his own angry tears???