You, Sir, Look Like An Idiot


So San Diego’s Alex Torres and the MLB made history last night when Torres wore this piece of shit, stupid looking hat, pro. If Kevin Federline (when he was fat) and Turtle from Entourage banged, you would be the byproduct. That’s you, sir. You look like their love child. And the hat, man.. it’s soo fucking dumb. You will never catch guy’s like Clayton Kershaw wearing something like that, because you know what a protective hat says? It says “I’m worried that a batter will hit a perfect line drive up the middle, because when I’m on the mound it might as well be BP. My shit is hittable.”

And what makes you think this is going to protect you from a baseball going well over 100 mph?

Remember when soldiers started wearing helmets.. I don’t know, thousands of years ago, you know, to protect themselves from swords and arrows and shit? Didn’t really get the job done.. and then soldiers in modern day battle with their bullet proof helmets that really weren’t all that “bullet proof”..

This is to baseball what the face guard is to basketball.. except basketball players don’t use it as a preventative thing.. they wait until they break their nose to wear it… because they know if everyone just starts wearing them, the whole league is going to look like one giant stupid mess.

Worst idea ever.