Woman Eats 9 Pounds Of Steak In Under 15 Minutes, And Flexes All Over Joey Chestnut’s Previous Record

HUFFPOST- A record for eating steak held by the most dominant competitive eater fell to a mother of four from Nebraska on Monday.

Molly Schuyler made short work of a 72-oz steak at Amarillo’s Big Texan Steak Ranch, the Amarillo Globe News reports, finishing it in 4:58.

Schuyler’s time beat the mark set by renowned hot-dog eater Joey Chestnut in 2008 when he took eight minutes and 52 seconds to clean his plate at the restaurant, according to Fox Sports.

Not yet sated, Schuyler continued gorging by eating a second 72-oz hunk of beef in 9:58 for a total of nine pounds of steak in just under 15 minutes. Her feast also included a baked potato, shrimp, salad and a bread roll, according to the Amarillo Globe News.

That’s far more than the suggested “deck of cards” portion size.

She sat down to the belly-busting meal weighing about 125 pounds.

The restaurant posted a photo of Schuyler basking in the glow of digestive triumph.

The Major League Eating’s chief executive officer ā€” never one to mince words ā€” hailed Schuyler’s performance in terms reserved for splitting the atom or Neil Armstrong’s moon walk.

“This was an unverified event, but if accurate it is clearly an advancement for the female gender and humanity as a whole,” said George Shea in an email to The Huffington Post “The skills demonstrated in this exercise are directly relevant to the survival and success of the species.”

Schuyler, a professional eater herself, previously set other records for eating fried mushrooms and chicken wings.

Well, I think anytime I see a headline that says a woman ate 9 pounds of meat in under 15 minutes, I click it. That’s eye catching news..

Oh what’s that you say? Joey Chestnut ate one 72-Ounce steak, a baked potato, a dinner roll, some shrimp and a salad in 8 minutes 52 seconds.. Let me just shatter that record in just under 5. FLEXXXING ALL OVER JOEY CHESTNUT.. Slapped that nerd across the face with her lady dick.. Joey might be watching somewhere, giving her props, but deep down inside he’s hurt.. Absolutely manhandled Joey’s pride.

But, that’s not it though.. She doubled what he did and did it in just under 15.. That’s 9 pounds of meat.. A wise man once told me, when I attempted my first food challenge, that you have to trick your stomach by shocking the fuck out of it.. Pound as much food as fast as possible, take that fucker by surprise, won’t even know what hit him..

She just fucking savaged that meat so hard. I posted a video to Facebook earlier of me savaging a sandwich.. “#savage”.. Well I feel like a huge pussy.. She just totally cuckholded any notion of me being a savage..

My favorite part is 5:05 when she has no regard for this lady’s feelings, and leaves her hanging high and dry, nothing funnier than watching someone hang a high five..
Lady, Molly’s got a whole 72-ounce steak to go she doesn’t have time for your lame high fives, get that shit out of here..

Next favorite part, when she drops the bomb that she’s a mother of four children..

PS- only a sturdy woman from Nebraska could pull this off. I just feel like people in states like Nebraska are more hardened..

Double PS – I checked Joey’s twitter to see if he got wind of this chick.. And to see if there was a response and found this gem instead

@BrennaLena you might want to check yourself before you question the validity of the World Gyro eating contest.. You might just get twitter knocked out by Joey Chestnut, “U may just be a troll… Surely u r lonely & unpleasant” Boom.. Roasted. That’s a TKO tweet if I’ve ever seen one..