This Guy Looking For A Place To Live Sounds Like An Absolute Champion

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Work experience doesn’t even matter to me when looking for a roommate it’s the better things in life that matter. This guys had me a “loud masturbation to NPR’s ‘Car Talk'”… I’m more of a cry masturbator to Nicholas Sparks books on tape.. But to his his own I suppose.. and his love for crafting OK Cupid profiles.. Tell me you haven’t crafted a good ol OK Cupid profile before and I’ll call you a liar… it’s some of the best fun.. Plus during your trial run you get to message all the sad single women in your town, your mom’s friends etc., it’s absolutely hilarious. And I need to live with someone who has absolutely no shame in masturbating.. Because I don’t want to be judged when I walk to the bathroom with my MacBook.. Don’t want to have to walk there with ESPN.com on my screen trying to pretend nobody knows what’s about to go down.. Don’t want to feel ashamed of myself.. Not about that life.. So the more open masturbation the better.

This guy could totally hang, you can just tell.. Or he’s just actually a useless piece of shit.. It could actually go either way. Life’s about rolling the dice, I’d give this guy a call if I wasn’t still living with my mom.

PS – roommate is one word bro, grow up.

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